Expert Advice: When to take the car keys from an aging parent

Host Amber Smith: Here's some expert advice from Dr. Sharon Brangman, chief of geriatrics at Upstate Medical University. How do you advise adult children when it's time to take the car keys away from a parent?

Sharon Brangman, MD: Well, this is one of the toughest things that we deal with in geriatrics. There is no set age when somebody should stop driving. This is a very individual thing. We should not have a one-size-fits-all. The aging process, in and of itself, can make driving more risky. For example, someone could have arthritis in their neck, and they can't turn their head to look over their shoulder when they're changing lanes, or they may have a weakness in their legs that could keep them from pressing down hard on the brakes. There are also vision problems that occur, or hearing problems that can make it difficult to drive. And of course, if you have any kind of memory problem that impacts your ability to make decisions or have appropriate reactions when you're driving, that could be another red flag.

Sharon Brangman, MD: So what we usually tell adult children is that they have to have a plan. You can't just do this overnight. You have to look and see how you are going to supplement the driving needs of their parents, for example, when they have to stop driving. And we live in a society, and especially in our city, we don't have a very walkable city, and most of our services are out in the suburbs. So when you stop someone from driving, you can cut them off from everything from groceries to the pharmacy, to going to church and socializing. So you have to have a plan. You have to have a process so that you can figure out who's going to fill in those gaps. A lot of adult children feel ambivalent because they can't do it, but we now have lots of driving services, and there are actually people who do this now as a living, who can come and help drive. And yes, you may have to give up some of your spontaneous ability to come and go, but you can still be able to get the things you need appropriately, if you don't have a car yourself.

Sharon Brangman, MD: And we always want to stop before there's a terrible accident. And I don't have a crystal ball to predict when that might happen for any one person, but we don't want to wait for someone to get hurt before we make that decision. And that's the part that gets tricky because again, that's a very individual thing.

Sharon Brangman, MD: There are driving evaluation programs that can be helpful, where an older adult can go and get a driving test by someone objective to just see how they are behind the wheel, and if there's any adaptations that might be helpful or anything that can be done to help them stay on the road safely. We have some patients who stopped driving at night, or they don't drive during the busiest times of the day when the roads are quieter, and that's sometimes is an adaptation that works. But unfortunately, there does come a time when it is time to hang up the car keys to keep you safe and to keep others safe, as well.

Host Amber Smith: You've been listening to Dr. Sharon Brangman, chief of geriatrics at Upstate Medical University.