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Neurological Emergencies—Metastatic Spinal Cord Compression

First a great (and, my friend swears, true) VA story.

A vet shows up in a midwestern VA ER, deathly ill. They manage to get his name and address before running him into the OR to take care of a perforated whatever which puts him in the ICU and near death's door for 6-10 weeks of really intense Health Care Resource Utilization. Of course, the patient is incommunicado during this episode, due to the multitude of tubes running in and out of orifices created by God and man.

He finally wakes up enough to be talked to. The patient rep is going crazy, he's trace the guy's social security number and he can't find any record in any service anywhere.

Negative hits in the Pentagon, local and national VA records, VAW posts, DAV, the works. He goes back day after day, trying to get more info, but without much success. Finally, an inspiration hits.

"Where did you fight?" he asks.

"North Africa, all over!" replies the patient.

"Which division were you in? Who was your general?" the rep continues.

The patient's eyes light up. "Fifth Panzer Division, Rommel!"